You know it's the silly season when news stories about what colour car is most likely to have an accident start appearing in the nationals. A recent survey by esure discovered that people who laboured under the names Lloyd and Natasha were the most likely to be involved in a crash. The tabloids duly picked the story up, and everyone was happy.

Well, everyone except a chap called Lloyd, who phoned esure to share his feelings.

"You've taken away my rights," complained Lloyd.

"What rights?" inquired a long suffering press man at esure.

"My human rights," steamed Lloyd. "Now give them back."

Understandably flummoxed, the esure spokesperson could do little else but offer the company address for a written complaint.

"I'll get your address from Companies House," retorted Lloyd. "And I'll be taking this matter to Europe..."

Backchat awaits the outcome with bated breath.