Guy Browning takes a sideways look at insurance jargon

J is for

Joint and several - The passing round of a cannabis cigarette

Jumbo risk - Risk of death after eating street hotdog

K is for

Keyman insurance - Insurance for concert pianist's fingers

L is for

Lapse - Place profit falls into for brokers

Larceny - Indecent larking about by intoxicated salesmen

Latent defect - Discovering on the train that your pants are back to front

Lessee - Glaswegian pronunciation of famous film dog

Letter of indemnity - Sick note from mother to avoid nasty meeting

Levy - Counterfeit jeans made in China

Lien - Name of uncouth secretary

Lienholder - Broker who fancies uncouth secretaries

Life annuity - How children view their parents' bank account

Life assured - Feeling you get after a successful meeting with managing director

Life expectancy - Calculation you do before a meeting with the managing director

Limitation - Estate version of Limit

Line sheet - Marks you get on your face when you've slept awkwardly

Liquidation - What happens to your bladder before a meeting with MD

Living on top - Accommodation above the broker

Lloyd's Name - Lloyd obviously

Loading - The transfer of most of the buffet to your paper plate

Loading the premium - Taking all the curried eggs from the buffet

Loanback - Kind of horse with distinctive markings