Guy Browning takes a sideways look at insurance jargon
C - is for . . .
Capital additions clause - A supplement reflecting the high cost of living in London
Capture and seizure - What happens when you try to pick up a pen under your desk with your toes
Carnet - A low fat ice cream
Catastrophe hazard - When you discover you've sent an e-mail to the entire company
Caveat emptor - Old style broker who wears a cravat and talks rather pompously
Cedent - Adhesive paste that secures dentures
Certificate of insurance - The piece of paper that is stored so carefully you can't find it
Chattels Nasty - rash you get from too much underwriting
Claims adjuster - Your partner's tendency to spoil your best stories by introducing facts
Clawback Desperate - but futile attempts to unsend dodgy e-mail
Closed fund - The petty cash tin when you're desperate
Combined liability policy - Marriage certificate
Commutation - How brokers get to their offices
Compound reversionary bonus - The tiny bit left after your boss has had his bonus
Consolidated option - The decision to stay on the sofa and not go to the gym
Consortium The last liquorices - the ones no one likes
Contingency fund - Petty cash
Contingent survivorship assurance - The promise you make to pay back the petty cash tin on pain of death
Contributory negligence - A form of long nightwear
Cooling-off period -What men require after removal of contributory negligence
