Pseudo-legendary, sequin-clad insurance trio The Sheilas plan to launch a new market-leading product this summer, with their debut single: “(I'm so) Happy Happy (You’re Mine).”

If the brackets weren’t confusing enough, meet the team. There’s Cathi, whose claim to fame is “I am lovely”; Emma, who is married to one of the Teletubbies (probably Laa-Laa); and Carly, who “loves cleaning.” Behind them (and who knows what else) will be former legends Stock, Aitken and Waterman.

So grab your handbags. Just make sure you’ve got handbag cover first.