Over a gruelling lunch Backchat got a shocking insight into the high-powered world of M&A.

Lesson 1: the art of deflection. When asked a particularly problematic question, always ask an equally taxing one in return.

Example: Q: Will there still be positions for our finance team? A: But what about the crumpet? We won't buy any company with ugly girls.

Apparently the target was so flustered that he completely forgot about the initial query and signed away. Backchat hopes others take a more progressive approach to acquisitions.