Stress-free ode

Ted Hughes and Philip Larkin wrote about many subjects, including parents and the swinging sixties, but insurance claims evidently did not provide them with enough inspiration for a poem or two.

However, these days it seems the subject has inspired one budding poet. Kent loss adjusters Jacksons were surprised to receive an Ode of Gratitude from a grateful customer who suffered a chip pan fire. Here is a selection of its seven verses:

The kitchen was full of flames and smoke,
As the chip pan combusted into flame,
The air was blue from the wife's language too,
Shouting that it was me that was to blame.

Her eyes were full of smoke and tears,
As she gazed up at the burnt ceiling plaster,
And with the whole house black with smoke residue,
It all looked such a complete disaster.

Then you arrived upon the scene,
And acted with such haste,
Calmed the wife, put her at ease,
Explaining that the kitchen can be replaced.

You sorted out a cleaning company,
And a building company too,
And all the work was done, done first class,
We now have our kitchen back as new.

So we thank you Mr Jackson,
For sorting out our mess,
Relieving us of all the worry,
And freeing us from any stress.