Reporting results can be a very tedious time for chief executives everywhere. So why not follow Henry Engelhardt, Admiral chief executive, and use some queer analogy to explain the current state of the motor market.

"Did you know that if you want to boil a frog and you throw the frog into boiling water, it will jump right out?" he says in his annual statement.

"But if you put the frog in a pot of cool water and turn up the heat it will boil quite nicely."

Backchat wonders whether readers are confused yet?

Engelhardt explains: "The gentle deterioration of the car market is akin to that slowly boiling frog." Eh?

"Previous cycles were more like throwing the frog into the boiling pot. The market would scream and react."

Enough said.